ang pakiramdam

nobody noticed the change.i just can't believe i had to undergo the melancholic plight towards escape and end up being unrecognized.Ellen's words stick to my mind now."Don't try to please everybody' cause you'll end up pleasing nobody". It's so true from the bottom of the bottomless pit. It made a lot of sense since I conjured in myself that I'd accept these consequences. Once, a pact between me and God was made. In the silence of my moments alone, I created a being so withdrawn and separated from this pathetic world...Now, I've decided to break through the open and reveal this truth that has kept me under the influence of the inner enemy. I don't need to explain myself...

the retreat

one day, i decided to leave the world i used to live in.(it's not astral projection)i went around town looking for people i can't possibly be acquainted with and fortunately,i found them.for about two weeks now,i've learned a lot from these people though there be times that i gravely miss my friends specially kampupot and marapait. i even tried to let go of my past but i realized that there is no such thing as letting go, only moving on as i've read in a text message. i put off my phone every day and opened it at night restricting myself from going to the nearest store and paying for load. i struggled to keep myself from keeping in touch with my loved ones, even my Mom and my closest friends. i barely made it! i still can't believe i'm back to reality... the time i spent alone with God made me think back on all the mistakes i've committed so i decided to pick up the broken pieces of my life and fix whatever i've destroyed. i would like to express my biggest thanks to my friends who supported me during my quiet time alone, my Mom who never questioned my shocking decision, and the Almighty God who served as a Comforter in those lonely moments of pain. THANK YOU. I LOVE YOU ALL.

POVERTY?

Poor? No load? No Lacoste imitation bag? No boyfriend? No blog? Take a look at this if these are what poverty is all about...

A Tribute to President Corazon C. Aquino

SHEPHERDESS OF THE SUN

Oh! How my wailing heart bleeds
For the Mother of this pathetic land
Who in her feeble shoulders
Carried us, lost, wandering sheep.
But alas! I cry with this country,
For there lies my cherished shepherdess,
Cold against my caress.

Amidst the beasts from foreign lands
And powers of our own,
She, unlike the socialite roam
In her sun-like suits array
Led us to the fold. Now in depths of earth
Lies my dear, dear shepherdess,
Cold against my caress.

When on the ground these people lay overthrown,
My esteemed shepherdess came
And in her bosom they helplessly clave.
Then once she battled with heart and mind
To overcome the treacherous enemy alone,
And now, here lies my noble shepherdess,
Cold and numb against my caress.

I feel for her sheep, now gone astray
Who once hailed her courage
To restore their wings of liberty
And miraculously convinced democracy to stay.
But forever shall the sun shed tears
For there lies my great, great shepherdess,
Cold and dead against my caress.

THE BUTTERFLY EFFECT(improved)

Here's my "BUTTERFLY EFFECT"...I edited it for a literary competition...hope you'll like it...

THE BUTTERFLY EFFECT(improved)
09-04-09

The moaning winds blow
In accordance to the dying
Sun, soon to permeate into the horizon.
Down, down the pine-sheltered mountain
Lies an Aphroditean meadow.
Dancing poppies around Goliath's ancestry
Of woody trunks and branches cover
The heaven-sketched iridescent plain.
Serenity engulfs this remarkable cradle
Of such an innocuous Destroyer.
Unknowing of intensive destruction She brings
Comes this tiny gift of creation,
Fluttering over the humbling reeds.
Woe to the towering works of man adore,
To his love for fabled beings,
To his thoughts so alike King Solomon,
To his olden hands of innumerable deeds,
To the whole of his ill-fated wealth for
In one soft flap of Her bright, yellow wings,
A hundred,
A thousand,
A million, she kills.

sociog2 moments

huhuhu.finally it's over...i feel great now that the endless nights are done...i don't need to go out hehe

To LT. COL. VICENTE B. BASILAN...

I dedicate this poem to my Dad, who in my weakness served as my strength, in my loneliness served as a friend. I love you Dad.

SONNET X: I Learn About Life by Lokking through His Eyes
(I adpoted the title from the song Through Her Eyes by DREAM THEATER)

When in my sadness I scorn myself
And in the shadows I seek thy presence,
May it be I still can't see the essense
That mem'ries are not bought by mere pelf.
In the midst of the cold, dark night
I walk in silent remorse;
The pain altered my life's straight course
And led me away, away from the light.
One thought of your distant smile
Crushes my heart in legions,
Flails my soul through the regions.
Alas,my Father!Let it be one mile.
For when I see myself through your eyes,
I strive to live,then die,and reach for the skies.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOM

This poem is a dedication to the woman who bore the burden of bringing me into this world, the woman behind my success, the woman who made me see the real world, the woman who strives to give me the best of education, the woman who holds the key to my mind, heart, and soul, my Mother, ROSEMARIE CHORAWAN BASILAN.



SONNET XI: A Lifetime I Owe to Thee
(A Tribute to my Mother on her birthday)

Nine months you carried me-that long-
My heart, soul, and mind, and all of me.
Though difficult it was you were strong;
I then owe it all, all my life to thee.

At times when we have bitter confrontations;
I often look but do not see what should be done.
When upon my wrongs you give corrections,
I say my wrong deeds are but none.

Once distress strived to engulf us
And Death came to besiege our hope,
Then did I look and came to see,thus,
Thy love led us up life’s dreary slope.

Today I survived and live up to my crucial role
For you, Mama, hold the key to my very soul.




HAPPY BIRTHDAY MA!
I LOVE YOU…
>>MARVIE<<

Rajinder-a Legend

Raj is the best tenor I've heard. He was my singing partner for 1 year until he went back to Zambales. I've missed his voice ever since and I would really love it if he came back. Our signature song is "Beauty and the Beast".
One day, I'll see him and we'll sing that song at the top of or voices. I dedicate my win last February 2008 to him. I love you partner...

A Moment of Remembrance

That's me when I was 14. That time, I played the violin better than my teacher. Now, I don't even know how to play "HAPPY BIRTHDAY".

My Dad bought it for my 13th birthday and made me take up violin lessons. I can still recall how big his smile was when I played my first piece, "DO LE AMO" (Do Rae Mon). Two full months after that day, I was able to play Pachelbel's Canon and other classics. Thanks to my teacher, Paul.

The Violin

I've been playing the violin for 4 years and I'm just starting to appreciate the peace it gives me whenever I play a classic favorite. Honestly, it's been ages since I last held it...I've decided to play again.Thanks to someone who made me realize the essence of an instrument.

missing a great friend

friends...
i miss OBET...he may be loud and annoying when it's time for practice,he may be a great dummy like me,he may be lying at times,he may like to fight over small matters,he may flood my inbox with quotes,he may not notice it,but i miss him/her so much...i wish upon Orion tonight to see him tomorrow...i love you friendship...

MY FAVE COUSIN

harhar...i feel like posting forever!!!

my cousin loves to make faces and i enjoy doing it with him.we've been tight since...uggh...i can't even recall ajajajang!!!well,we've been BCF since we were in our diapers.up until now,our friendship has not wavered(not a bit).ROCK ON CHING!!!

nothing to do...

i just dropped by the blog site of my college and i really appreciate it ajajajang!!!it's nice that someone,finally,decided to create something new for the students to check out...harhar...


i haven't posted for a long time now and i think i will start posting tomorrow....FIGHTING!!!



HAHA..this is a pic of me and my good friend arnel.i'm glad he came back...bonding time na ulit 'tol...

the army wives' prayer

i read this prayer in the internet and it made me cry...this is for my partner who entered the great profession of arms to fulfill a promise, for my Father who gave his whole life to serve the country-my idol, for my Mother who always waited for him to come back...

Army wives prayer

Dear Lord,
Give me the greatness of heart to see the difference between duty and his love for me. Give me understanding that I may know, when duty calls him he must go. Give me a task to do each day, to fill the time when he's away. And Lord, when he's in a foreign land, keep him safe in your loving hand. And Lord, when duty is in the field, please protect him and be his shield. And Lord, when deployment is so long, please stay with me and keep me strong. Amen.

wala lang...

A Quote for Love


If love be as false so as true,

Then none to the altar should swear "I do".

benj,this is for you...

An honest dedication to my pal, my pet, my saddest friend, my dear BENJIE CASWANG...

For Benjie: Ode to Melancholy

When the saddest poem was penned,

I thought to write the saddest of the saddest.
I wrote of the people's plea
For freedom and the cry for revolution.
I wrote of my dear,poor country
And its quest for union.
I wrote of the hurt and the lonely,
And their faces, not to mention.
But alas! With mine heart
I then did see
That the saddest of the saddest poem
Ought not to be written by intention.
It is embedded in the clandestine me-
My story.

I dedicate this poem to the first person I trusted with my story. She knows the entire life of "the girl who doesn't say it all". To the person whom I run to...the one who understands...the one who has always been patient...To the person close to my heart, Ma'am MIRIAM ANNE F. SABOY.

The Omniscient Point of View: My Story

In my darkest hours,
Through the abyss of my hurts,
In the bottomless pit of nothing,
A cry from the clearing alerts.

I turned to see the intruder.
A blurry figure nears me;
In the corner of my mind
Lo,she looks with sympathy.

Anger shot through my veins.
I was shaken by one touch
Of her cold, damp hands
But I couldn't say much.

The tolerant words came out
One by one and to eleven.
She uttered the very words
I haven't heard back then.

I scrambled out of my shell;
I knew then and there
From the day she picked me up
Trust,to her I could share.

Beer Takes Time

My friend Epang gave the title for this short but meaningful poem.

*Beer Takes Time*

Love pushes the falling of tears.
Tears push the expression of emotions;
It takes a friend and a few beers.

Death's Call

DEATH'S CALL

Death comes on a pace.
Anytime it can hit you;
None can win the race.

THE ANT

I made two haikus for my Creative Writing class today. I find it cool to make new poems,specially a haiku.

THE ANT

Walking through the way-
A grain of seed on his back,
Life goes on that day.

IPSISSIMA VERBA(The Very Words)

I dedicate this poem to my family.To the BASILAN and CHORAWAN clan.I would never be here if you weren't there to make life better.Thanks for the laughter after the tears,the smiles after the pain,the love beyond hate,and the patience and love you've shown when I was unlovable.

"Ipsissima Verba"

When I look back on life
I see the dull realities
Of hopes and dreams,
Of failures and fears.
But through the harshness
I see one troop:
That of my mother's
And that of my dad's group.
I,always a part of their guild,
I,always a part of the guffaw,
They,who serve as my shield,
They,ne'er replace mere pelf.
We refine each other
True,like fine gold.
Me a person of the clandestine,
Me,faking I'm bold.
Through my infinite distress,
Through my plausible prestige,
I see the furnished truth,
That "us" any solicitude can't besiege.

"I Am"

a dedication to a listener,shot-mate,great gay friend who has unforgettable memories with me,EFREN CASUGA...

"I Am"

A friend,
Who truly listens-
On me you can depend.

A sister,
Who rages against them,
Them who make you bitter.

A son,
Who gives it all,
Who could for you all day run.

A person,
Who,yes,fails sometimes
And rises when the fury is on.

And I am,
Epang the Great
Who fights with all the glam.

a ballad

it's my first time to make one so please bear with it...

"The Falsity of a Family's Fidelity"

They were a number of three:
A father,a mother,a son.
'Twas a pleasant group
When the third's life begun.

Out in the streets
They would stroll all day,
Out in the night
They'd lie beside the bay.

Then the boy turned five.
The gathering was full of glee.
In one blow of the candles
He's reached the age of accountability.

Off to school he goes
And sees the world outside.
He looks but doesn't see
The comely world's evil side.

When he goes home each day
Peace and love he feels-
Not a word there is to prove,
Everything there is to kill the ills.

One night as he goes to sleep
There comes a moaning;
His ears are glued to the wall,
His heart falls to a quick beating.

The moans and cries went on.
Day by day it rang
On the lad's innocent mind
Like one hitting a can.

He wakes up one day
To find out she's bade farewell.
He says,"she's off on a voyage",
Her return no one could tell.

Time ran like lightning;
The boy evolved to manhood.
Still no sign of the mother
When on his father's grave he stood.

On black he goes back home,
Sees a box under the latter's bed.
There he finds skull and bones.
Tears fell for his mother-tears unshed.

words of encouragement

my teacher stated something today that really shook me...

"The greatest test of courage on earth is to bear defeat without losing heart."
-R.G. Ingersoll

Feb. 17; A Loss

Unwanted events are to come.
Someone would dare
To take the belongings of some.
The day closes with a frown.
To revenge is a snare-
Who to take down?
What now? It's gone!
To complain is a "no"...
After all, it's done.

Deluded

A conpiracy they said had begun.
In the twighlight
Tramping feet are heard.
Spears and lighted torches
Are apparent in the moon so white.
In the castle's garden
The enemy will indict
A rather innocent mind.
In one blow of the horn,
Arrows fly into the night.
Betrayal, deception, disgrace
Escape into the waking morn;
One shouts "Mio Cid!",
And it ends the chase.

Behind the Smiles of Hypocrisy

Another day it was for me
When their talks began.
So then I listened,
My ears I opened.
Their smiles of the unreal
Pierce through my bones;
Their words of praise
Hit me like stones.
Let me, my thoughts express;
Let me, I say, speak out,
Of my feelings so deep,
Of my fears and that of doubt.
But one cannot retaliate
One cannot fight back.
When the smiles and pats began to fade,
I saw, 'twas fidelity that lacked.

Of Senses and Thoughts

a dedication to a great artist,great friend,great gay,JETLEY IBEA...

"Of Senses and Thoughts"

Anytime it comes,
A simple call from the subconscious,
A light pat on the edge of the mind.
A high calling from your senses
Would grasp the moment of truth.
And with a brush of pen and ink,
A masterpiece is produced.

once a dreamer

i never thought i'd win. well, it was the thrill of a lifetime when they called out my name! i felt everything(i mean all my doubts and fears) drown into a heap of coal when i stepped up on stage. it was one of those moments i will never forget. i went home that night feeling hopeful of a new era in my life where i could express myself freely. but later that night after my sister took pictures of me holding my plaque of recognition, i suddenly felt empty... questions of what and why roamed my mind... i began to ask myself, "is that all you've got?", and "is this how far you can go?". that's when i made up my mind that i will aim for the best no matter what-not for the applause, not for the glory, not for the respect i'd get, not for honor, not for the trophy, not for the hugs and pats on the back, not for words of congratulations, not for the expectations of many, not for the win, but for the satisfaction of having been a part of the word "success" even through the thing called literature.

literary awards night

hi.i didn't win in the poetry writing competitions but i won 1st place in essay writing. i will post my winning piece soon. hope you'll like it.

Once Upon A Poem

Once Upon A Poem

Cinderella, poor Cinderella.
Lovely-would work all day
Dreams to meet him,
Him who'd come and stay.
Fairy god-mother comes
And she wears the shoes of glass
Goes to the ball,
Runs off in a dash!
Leaving them behind,
She's happy, very happy;
She's had a happy ending-
Woe to her family.

Snow White, pretty, white Snow White
She stays in the wide woods.
Loved by the seven lucky dwarfs,
And then one intrudes.
One kiss from her Prince
And she is a princess,
For love prevailed-
He passed the test.
They go to the palace,
Leaving the dwarfs empty.
They have a happy ending
But woe to her family.

Belle, simply dazzling Belle,
For her household
She has to go
And do what she's told.
A short stay with Beast-
Some short talks
And a few moments-
A few precious walks.
Overwhelmed by her beauty,
The spell is broken!
Again, love prevails.
One oath of eternity
And they have a happy ending.
But woe to her family.

Ariel, a youth of perplexing beauty, Ariel.
Treasured by the merfolk
And favored by her father.
But she wanted to walk.
Everything under the sea
Was hers for the taking
But all these she denied
For Prince Eric's wedding.
She then gets feet,
Marries and lives happily.
She also had a happy ending
But woe to her family.

All of them...
Left their homes for an exchange of heart.

WORD

4 Letters: WORD

A word is enough
Enough to see one fall,
Enough to make one cry
And one destructive word
Is enough, enough
To see one die.

THE BUTTERFLY EFFECT

I made this today for my Creative Writing class. I dedicate this poem to my sister, my mentor, my suba-mate, my nomo-mate, my friend.

THE BUTTERFLY EFFECT
The moaning winds blow;
The sun is soon to set
And down the pine-filled mountain
Lies an open meadow.
Flowers in bloom and tall trees
Cover the wide,long plain.
Then comes a tiny thing,
Flying over the bowing reeds,
Lands on top of a violet.
With one flap of her bright, yellow wings,
A hundred, a thousand,
A million, she kills.

i just don't feel like writing today

lately, i haven't been writing..maybe i just lost the mood...i wish someone would help me bring my interest back....huhuhuhu

i had to think before i posted it

April Fool's Haiku




.

When " I Thought" Reaches Its Limits

one in a million

The Foolish Reader





















,

so far this is the best...

" "










,





.




and so i tried to be a poet.

the second poem i made

Hollow Poem

please analyze the poem before you criticize.thank you

King Solomon's Foolish Sonnet























?

i got the idea from the play "Death of a Salesman"

Death of A Sonnet

Suddenly i felt it, the interest to write, then my desire died down;

this is one literal poem

Blacked Out

i got the idea from the movie "SILENCE OF THE LAMBS"

Silence of the Pens



















.

Into the Subconscious

...

In A Coma


,




.

i really felt this way when i wrote it.

When Words Aren't Enough


When I began,
I put down my pen.

i think this one's good...

Poet On Strike

this is actually one of the worst poems i made...

When the Reader is Illiterate

my friend mae appreciated this one.

Bottomless Pit
















Fall.

this is a first so please bear with it

Technical Difficulties

the biggest break in my life

Jose Garcia Villa is my IDOL. Because of him, I was inspired to write poems like the ones he wrote-poems with no lyrics. I dedicate these poems to God who introduced Sir Jose Garcia Villa to my world, to my Mom who will always be my inspiration, to my Ate(AJANG), who has been a patient mentor in correcting my mistakes, to my little sister(KITTI), who will always be the apple of my eye, to my Dad, who even after death will be the one and only man in my life, and to my idol, Sir Jose Garcia Villa.